Can fashion and comfort combine for ostomates?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have been quite brave with dresses since getting Tomas but I am always checking and patting that area. I suppose I feel blessed with having an ” outie” for a stoma in that my peristomal skin is reasonably good, but the downside is that you can see the telltale lump under my clothes ( or maybe I can but others can’t, but I think they can)

There are many people asking what they can wear that is not just baggy trousers and saggy tops, so I am going to find out. I already have a page about the subject  HOW TO FEEL GOOD IN CLOTHES

But this is how I feel, and not necessarily how everyone feels.  I now think I need to look into this subject a bit more. Many ostomates feel self conscious when going out for a posh night out in their glad rags, and we check ourselves in the mirror at every angle, but of course we all know that our silhouette can change during the night, so a flimsy wispy dress is a no no for many but the very daring.

There are some wonderful lingerie and underwear now for ostomates, some are very well known now and do well, for example VANILLA BLUSH 

(I have noticed that Vanilla Flush do a lovely lounge wear bottoms and I am a bit tempted to get them, and they are also available for men)

But I would love to see more clothing lines. I know that a lot of high street clothing can be worn by us but it would be nice to see things such as body con dresses and jumpsuits that are made with us in mind. Most jumpsuits show the outline of the bag or if you wear a band, you can see that through the material. The materiel needs to be thicker but still lightweight . Same for tight ish dresses. I wear high waisted jeans that are as soft as possible but must admit that the band can still drag my bag downwards, which is uncomfortable and leads to itching. I usually end up with leggings because they are the most comfortable thing I own. Crossover tops/ dresses, belts and patterns all help to hide lumps and bumps that we don’t want on show.

The good news is that the ideas are starting. I went to the Purple Wings charity ball and conference this year and there was a new product there, that was exciting.

I AM DENIM is the new jean for ostomates. They are low cut but have a waistband that hides everything else, wonderful. Just the fact that there are people out there that care and are willing to design and try warms my heart. They are dearer that the average pair of jeans but the way they are made and the added benefits mean that the production costs , I expect, are more.

But that can’t be it can it? well I have been scanning the world wide web and found some fairly obscure companies that seem to think we all want high  waisted  elastic polyester trousers and old fashioned knitted tops, or underwear ( not knitted underwear ) and we are all over 70yrs old ,hmmmm it all seems like hard work. As a rule I think we can wear most things but I have definitely tried on a few things and been very disappointed. Not sure what the answer is, just to find what works for us all I suppose. We all assume our bags can be seen, but in reality is it just our insecurities ?

We need more designers so if any of the clothing companies are reading this, you have a niche market waiting…………….

If anyone has any useful information regarding clothing, not necessarily made for ostomates, but maybe an item of clothing that has made them feel fabulous, let me know and I will add it to my page. Does it camouflage the outline? Is it comfortable? Is it patterned or plain?

What on earth can I wear?

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I have to say that I just cannot get on with stoma support wear. In all honesty I have only tried the one we get on prescription similar to the above picture. I just find it tight and restricting, my skin around Tomas starts to itch too.I worry that when the bag starts filling, it will squish it and it will leak. I think I won’t be able to tell when it needs emptying. I would like a nice lacy very stretchy and not too tight, band. I have seen some that look nice but don’t want to spend money on them if they are not right, so if anyone has some nice support wear that I have described, please let me know.

I must say, I do quite well with clothes now. For months I wore leggings and that was about it. I still love them for comfort but I have worn dresses and jeans. I have always worn high waisted jeans, as they are much more comfortable than the low or mid waisters that cut into your tummy and you can’t sit down and eat without being really uncomfortable.

I wear skinny jeans quite happily and tights dresses too. I used to think everyone and his dog would see my bag, but they really can’t. It is something that you get over with time.

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I still scrutinise myself before I step out the door, but when I first had Tomas, I wore for comfort and covering up. I thought I had to wear loose tops/tunics and shouldn’t wear tight things as I saw myself as flawed. My only issue with a dress is when my bag starts filling , it flaps about a bit unless I tuck it into my pants, and you can notice it through the dress. This is why I thought a stoma support garment might help, it probably does as far as flattening it all, but I just feel as though it is doing something that I can’t see. At least I can tell when I need to empty if the bag is loose.

As far as sex goes, it is no different than before surgery. ( Except it sounds like a bag of crisps between us ). I would still like a nice lacy something, to cover it, but really want it to be comfortable. I am very lucky that my husband is fantastic and doesn’t see the bag whatsoever. So I am not at all bothered about showing it in front of him.

I still wear baggy or tunic tops, but again more for comfort than self confidence. I am not ashamed of my body and scars, in fact I am very proud of them. It shows what I have been through and overcome.

It is very inspiring to see my fellow ostomates getting on with it and looking fabulous at the same time. I am going on holiday in a couple of weeks and aim to wear my bikini with pride. Watch out for my next blog about flying with a stoma and being abroad.

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